


Heavenly Subconscious

by MortisBane



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: Thrawn Series - Timothy Zahn (2017)
Genre: Discord plot bunny, M/M, ZsforSs, confuzing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-05
Updated: 2019-01-05
Packaged: 2019-10-04 16:23:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,289
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17307884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MortisBane/pseuds/MortisBane
Summary: “They’re this old legend that deep space pilots tell everywhere they go.  Some race of Angels that live in the thousands of moons over Iego.  They’re beings that glow brightly and can take the form of an individual's most desired person.  But they’re just a myth.”“So was I, if you recall Commander.”Idea comes from @confuzing on tumblr/ZsforSs on AO3, they had the idea and let me write it, so go see their stuff!





	Heavenly Subconscious

**Author's Note:**

> Idea comes from [confuzing](http://confuzing.tumblr.com/) on tumblr/ZsforSs on AO3, they had the idea and let me write it, so go see their stuff!

The entire crew was tense, and when the crew was tense, they weren’t working at peak efficiency.  However, Thrawn understood why. Uncovering a slaving operation and apprehending a shipment of “stock” would undoubtedly put them on edge.  Eli confirmed this on his own during night shift. His emotional rant late that night gave Thrawn all the insight he needed on how the rest of the crew was feeling.

Thrawn himself wasn’t comfortable with the scenario, slavery was always a sore spot for him.  But unlike Humans, he was much better at concealing his emotions, and not allowing them to interfere with his mission.  Which, at the moment was returning each kidnapped slave back to where they were taken from. The process was simple at first, thirty seven individuals were found, half being human, which meant the Navy allowed them to provide aid.  Groups were taken at a time by the slavers, meaning that returning them dwindled the number they had quickly. And most coming from the same corner of the galaxy.

The first chunk requested to be brought to Coruscant, mainly humans, where they were instructed to bring them all to begin with after rescuing them.  Thirty seven became twenty five. The next stop brought them to Raydonia, losing another three, then eight on Felucia. A family of farmers gratefully reunited on Saleucami.  On Garel seven were returned to their families and homes narrowing their numbers down to three. With each person brought to their home, Thrawn could see his crew calming and finally beginning to act back to normal.  All except Eli.

He still continued to work flawlessly.  Day in and day out, standing at Thrawn’s side, efficiently continuing on, perhaps to a degree even performing at a higher level.  But the tension never left his body. There was a rage lingering just underneath the surface. Thrawn was certain no one else could see it, but he could.  This isn’t their first crossing with slaves, but this time rather than butting with the Empire’s questionable tactics, this was an independent criminal business.  The information gained from the transporters deemed this a new and inexperienced rise in slavery, however until they tracked down the source, they had a chance to continue growing.  And Eli was getting antsy as the days went by. Thrawn wanted to put an end to this new slaving threat as soon as possible. A puzzling thought came to him however, as he didn’t know where the driving force behind this desire lay.  But the force behind it was less important than the drive to end it.

The final planet they ended on was Lothal.  A simple planet on the edge of the outer rim, but had been gaining Imperial attention in recent years.  Thrawn met briefly with the Governor, Pryce he knew, whom they’d met before at the Gala with Yularen. She seemed far too excited to see sight of Eli and himself once again.  No, just him, and he filed away that information to keep an eye on her in the future. The meeting quick, just passing off the kidnapped couple, and Thrawn was relieved to leave the overbearing woman behind.  She asked a lot of questions on his future assignments.

And then there was one.  The final one from the original thirty seven.  And upon returning to the Chimaera with Eli, and asking him where their final guest needed to be returned.  He didn’t have an answer.

“I’ve been asking everyone who have been watching over the rescued slaves.  No one can give a concise answer on who they are or where they go. Everyone keeps saying they look different than the last.”  He explained, scanning through his datapad.

“How do you mean, Commander?”  His asked as the pair stepped into the lift and heading to the detention level.  Thirty seven extra passengers who needed places to sleep and adequate refreshers left the Chimaera at a loss.  They instead used the detention level, placing two in a cell, keeping those from the same places together if possible.  Troops allocated to escort them to places such as the mess and the refresher.

“I don’t know sir.  No one seems to know anything.  Don’t know how we even had this one for as long as we did without anyone looking into this before.”  He sighed shaking his head. Thrawn watched his shoulders raise, but not fall back down. He was frustrated.

“We will get to the bottom of this Commander.”  Eli nodded, scrolling quicker through the information on his datapad.  Thrawn felt irked to see him so taught, but he pushed the thought away and looked forward.

Reaching their destination, the duo walked down the hallway.  All the cell doors were open except the one at the far end, guarded by a single trooper.  He was offset from the door, rather than directly at its side, almost directly in front of it.  Less like he was guarding the inhabitant, but rather protecting them, defensively.

“Trooper 4824.”  Thrawn addressed, narrowing his eyes at the soldier.  They flinched and looked up at him, as if only just realizing he was there.

“S-Sir!”  He stuttered, standing at a stiffer attention.

“Our final rescued slave is in there, correct?”  Eli asked, tilting his head to the side and shutting off his data pad.

“Y-Yes sir!”  He nodded and they waited for him to let them pass.  He didn’t move.

“Trooper, we need to speak with them, step aside.”  The trooper snapped his attention back to Thrawn and visibly shook.

“S-Sir, they…”  He paused, and made no attempt to move or continue his sentence.

“Speak.”  He put on what Eli referred to as his “Command Voice” and that got the trooper’s full attention.

“I think they’re an angel!”  He rushed out, dropping their blaster from attention.  Thrawn narrowed his eyes again, and turned his attention to Eli.  Who stared at the trooper dumbfounded.

“You mean like the ones from Iego?  Those are just myths soldier.” He responded face then falling into disbelief.

“Commander Vanto, what are Angels?”  Thrawn grabbed his gaze, those warm brown eyes feeling like they looked straight through him.

“They’re this old legend that deep space pilots tell everywhere they go.  Some race of Angels that live in the thousands of moons over Iego. It’s not too far from here.  They’re beings that glow brightly and can take the form of an individual's most desired person. But they’re just a myth.”

“So was I, if you recall Commander.”  Eli’s face raised in temperature, his skin tone hiding the flush of color, but not to Thrawn’s eyes, his infrared spectrum picking up the change easily.

“This is different sir,” he turned his gaze away, “a being that can change form based on one’s deepest desires?  It’s ridiculous!” Eli appeared embarrassed, but Thrawn wasn’t going to relent.

“Aren’t Changelings members of your galaxy?”

“Well, yeah.”

“Sir!”  The trooper spoke, still visibly shaken.  “I know what I saw, that being is otherworldly.  They looked just like my husband who passed away three years back...exactly the same…”

“Calm yourself trooper, or we will have to replace your post.  Now step aside and let us through.” Thrawn raised his chin, daring the trooper to disobey, but he wouldn’t dare now.

“Yes sir, sorry sir!”  Pressing the door release, he stood to the side, allowing Thrawn and Eli to pass.  They strode in, shoulder to shoulder, their guest laying down with their back to them.  They didn’t move at their entrance, but that didn’t bother Thrawn.

“I’m Lieutenant Commander Vanto, this is Admiral Thrawn, we’re here to ask you some questions about where the slavers abducted you from so we can return you home.  Do you know basic?” Eli spoke as the door closed behind them. After a second, he repeated the sentence in Sybisti for good measure. The being slowly rose, the blanket draped over their form sliding down slowly, exposing pale flesh, that appeared almost to glow in this light.  They turned to the side, dropping their feet onto the floor, in a slow graceful motion, and turned their head up, eyes meeting Thrawn’s own.

For just a moment, he saw silver blue irises, and just as quickly they were gone, and familiar brown eyes were locked with his, framed by dark hair and warm brown skin.  He was staring at Eli, and Eli was staring back. But looking to his side, Eli stood there still, frozen stiffly in his spot. Thrawn looked back, but he knew the truth, the two were identical.  The only discernible difference between them was their clothing. The one at his side in his Imperial Uniform, the one before him in traditional Chiss bonding garb. Long, navy blue draping fabrics with intricate red linings matching those of the under eye marks of bonded Chiss.

“Hello.”  He spoke, voice coming out exactly like Eli’s, matched with a warm smile.  Thrawn is almost never caught off guard, always prepared for just about any scenario to occur.  But to see Eli Vanto, smiling at him, wearing a traditional outfit of his own people, meant only to be seen on the day of one’s bonding, wasn’t something he could have predicted.  He couldn’t speak.

The real Eli looked far worse.  He kept looking at Thrawn, then to the fake Eli and back, each time looking more and more confused.  The seconds ticked by, and Thrawn pulled his thoughts back together, grateful for his own outward stoicism.

“Who are you?”  He spoke, hands twitching behind his back.  The fake Eli never stopped smiling at him.

“I am of the Thousand Moons.  These beings took me from my sisters, I want only to return to my home.”  The Wild Space accent seemed more prominent than Eli’s own, the sound running shivers up Thrawn’s spine.  The sweet tones making his chest feel warmer, his hands twitching behind his back.

“You mean the moons over the world of Iego?”  Thrawn questioned, glancing at the Eli to his side.  Who still looked too shocked to speak. Was he seeing the same as Thrawn was, a version of himself, or something else entirely?  The false Eli nodded slowly, his smile never never falling as they spoke.

“You’re an angel!”  Eli called, finally speaking, Thrawn noting how heated his cheeks had become.

“It’s what I’ve always been called.”  The false Eli answered. But staring at this version of Eli, who smiled more, who’s accent was thicker, and looked ready to draw bonding marks on him, was putting Thrawn further and further on edge.  They had what information was necessary, and until Thrawn looked more into the myth surrounding these Angels, he could not accurately approach this conversation to get any more useful information. It was time to take his leave.

“Commander Vanto, we are done here.”  He said, turning on his heel and heading for the door.  He saw the Human look at him then the false Eli and back again.

“B-But sir.”  He protested, following quickly.

“We have what we need for the moment Commander.  We will take you to your home.” He faced the false Eli again who still was smiling.

“Thank you Mitth’raw’nuruodo.”  He responded, bowing his head, and that did it for him.  Hearing his own name come from Eli’s voice, perfectly pronounced in his accent.  He was ready to go. Walking out, Eli following right after him. He didn’t speak, or even pause his step, walking towards the lift.  Waiting for the doors to open, he looked at Eli, relieved to see him in his uniform.

“You didn’t tell it your full name.”  Eli spoke, despite wishing he wouldn’t, Thrawn knew he would.  “How did it know?”

“I am unsure.  I will retire to my office and look up what information I can on these creatures.”  He answered. The lift doors slid open, Thrawn wasting no time stepping inside.

“Sir...Thrawn.”  Eli rarely addressed him by name when on duty, Thrawn looked down at him.  “What...um, what did it look like to you?” Thrawn directed his attention back forward, watching the levels slide by them, closer and closer to their destination.  He waited, focusing on the pull of the lift to ground him. The doors opened finally, and Thrawn’s office was just down the hall, within sight.

“It looked,” he began stepping off the lift, “like an Angel.”  And with that, the conversation was over. He walked to his office, acknowledging the trooper there guarding it, who opened the door for him.  He turned to the side, Eli still standing at the end of the hall, a far off look in his eyes. He wished he was smiling. And strode alone into his office.

Hours later and Thrawn had found nothing to calm his nerves.  Every piece of literature, written record, and art depiction of these Angles from the Thousand Moons lines up with what Eli said.  They are beings whose story seem more broadly spread by pilots, of creatures that can assume the form of a person’s most desired person.  And unlike normal Changelings they can assume forms of non-existing people, or depict people in the perfect fantasy of the viewers mind. Any piece of art either showed the Angels as glowing beings of pure light that swarm shuttles, or tricksters who take on the form of spouses to trick Humans.

What this meant for Thrawn, looking at the information laid before him was somewhat grim.  Deep in his subconscious, a place that these creatures could somehow peer into, he desired Eli, in a manner beyond simple friendship.  A feeling much stronger, and the implications could cause disastrous results.

To take Eli in the manner he deeply desires, if Eli reciprocated, would not be simple.  In a xenophobic Empire that already distrusted Thrawn and his actions, which already persecuted Eli just for his association to Thrawn, wouldn’t approve of a romantic union between them.  Many interspecies relationships were frowned upon, especially in the navy, making them exceedingly rare.

As well, Eli is his subordinate, which he also knew was frowned upon by the Navy.  Not against regulations, but always perceived in a negative light. Just keeping Eli at his side to help him cultivate his skills, has put Eli in a corner he didn’t need to be.  Robbed him of opportunities he deserved, alliances, and friendships between others off the Chimaera. Remembering how that false Eli smiled at him, so warm and genuine, that’s what he wanted, more than anything.  He wanted to see Eli happy. He’s no stranger to ignoring his own desires, if the outcome is the best for everyone, he can sacrifice something once again.

His door chimed, the notification popping up on the datapad laying at his desk.  Eli was requesting entry. He accepted it quickly, not surprised to see him returning.  Though he’d expected him sooner. He heard the first door open and close, and Eli’s quick footfalls down the short hallway.  Then the second door followed, and the man of his thoughts strode in, datapad held tightly in his hands. Thrawn slowly stood to greet him.

“Thrawn!”  Eli stopped right at the desk, slamming his datapad down.  Thrawn noticing how exasperated he was.

“Eli.”  He addressed, noticing how much the other perked at the sound of his own name.

“I really need to know what that Angel looked like to you, like an actual description this time.”  Thrawn rose his brow lightly, strolling around the side of his desk to stand before the shorter Human.

“And why is it’s appearance so necessary?”  That made him pause, subtly chewing the inside of his cheek.  “What is it you saw?” Eli wring his hands together, tugging and smoothing the skin.  A nervous tick he’d had since Thrawn met him, though it was much more rare to see in recent years.  He raised his head, catching Thrawn’s eyes, and his chest halted movement, Eli’s breath having caught in his throat.

“The Angels can take the form of one's deepest desire yeah?  You were looking into that.”

“That is correct looking at the lore behind them and the artistic depictions of them.”  Eli’s hands tightened around themselves, his throat constricting as he swallowed something down his throat.

“The Angel...it looked like…”  He took a deep breath, sighing deeply.  “It looked like you.” His gaze moved away, embarrassed to meet Thrawn’s gaze.

“The Angel appeared similar to me?”

“No.  Exactly like you, like a perfect copy.  Just, only a little different.” He was very uncomfortable, his entire body flushed with heat, hands trembling in front of him, and his poor lip being worried between his teeth.

“How so?”  He felt the need to know.

“I-It had long hair, like the first time we had found you, dressed the same too…and it’s voice, it sounded more like before you got used to speaking basic, that subtle accent you had in the beginning…”  Thrawn’s mouth felt dry, he tried to swallow, but was unable.

“What does this tell you, Eli?”  The man clenched his hands, letting them fall to his sides as fists.  Thrawn took a slow step closer, catching Eli’s attention.

“That I need to know what you saw.”  He was deflecting, biding time. Thrawn let him.

“It was pale, with glowing skin and silver blue irises.  But after it saw me, it changed.” He moved past Eli, clasping his hands behind his back.  “It’s eyes changed to a dark brown, warm and inviting. It’s skin darkening to a soft brown.  As it sat up, it appeared shorter than it did while lying down. And it’s hair,” Thrawn turned back to Eli, taking the few steps to stand in front of him.  He was watching him closely, eyebrows upturned, like Thrawn’s words held the answers to the universe. “Its hair was a deep brown, like caf, and a bit long but held right where they wanted it.”  He reached forward running his fingers through Eli’s hair, watching his breath stutter. “It looked exactly like I said it did, an Angel.” Eli swallowed again, Thrawn watched his throat muscles move around it.

“Thrawn.”  His voice was softer, whispering, like being too loud would snap them out of this moment.

“Yes Eli?”

“I’m gonna do something, just uh...stop me if you don’t want to.”

“Proceed.”  His hands twitched at his sides, before slowly coming up and cupping Thrawn's cheeks.  His thumbs caressed the prominent cheekbones of his face, before he felt the pull of Eli’s arms.  Their faces grew closer, Thrawn following the pull, and not fighting the smile at seeing Eli rise higher on his toes.  His breath ghosted over Thrawn’s lips, tongue slipping across his own to wet them.

Before either could pull back, he pushed forward, pressing hard against Thrawn’s mouth, fingers hooking behind his head.  Thrawn brought his hands to Eli’s waist, clutching the fabric there tightly, tugging the two of them slightly closer. The kiss was short, Eli pulling away first, a sigh tumbling out of his mouth shakily.

“Maybe more myths are true than I thought.”  He whispered, giving Thrawn the smile he longed so much for.

“This is the second time a myth has come true for you, is it not?”  Thrawn asked, smiling right back at him.

“At this rate I ought to go lookin’ for the Fountain of Youth.”  He laughed, deep in his chest and it sounded sweet against Thrawn’s ears.

“What is the Fou-”

“I’ll tell you later.”  And he locked their lips together again.  Thrawn was content to put that aside for now, though he would ask later.  But the feeling of Eli’s lip moving against his own, and fingers carding through the hair at the base of his head was more important at the moment.

**Author's Note:**

> [orange-helius](http://orange-helius.tumblr.com/) drew some amazing art of this fic, so go please check that out [Here](http://orange-helius.tumblr.com/post/182169964788/illustration-to-heavenly)


End file.
